Sunday, 16 February 2014

Divorce and Staying in Control

Separation and divorce throws you headfirst into the VULNERABLE, scared and trapped zone. You CAN find your inner strength and belief that this situation does not need to govern your future, your beautiful positive future life.


Our fears start to encroach like flood water. Once they start and you don’t make efforts to stop them, they can begin seamlessly to take over your life. You feel out of CONTROL , then anger, bitterness and resentment are given free reign to party in your overburdened, tired and stressed head. 

On Friday I was outside in the lashing windy rain, digging rubble and sand, shifting from one pile to another, attempting – with a degree of SUCCESS, to change the direction of flood water.  

Flood waters are muddy, full of floating unhelpful debris that enter into your life uninvited and settle in your home, your mind and heart. 


Shifting all the baggage we carry around in our lives, especially after a breakdown of a relationship is mentally harder, scarier AND resolvable.  I refuse to let those fears flood in, to allow them to introduce unhelpful, resentful and uncontrolled wreckage into my life.  

Do I allow those fears to remind me with any bitterness that I do not have a partner to support me. I am not tempted to wish my marriage had been better and that my X should have been here, instead I have LEARNT to let that unhelpful stuff go.

Shifting baggage in our lives is hard, we do not always feel quite as strong or prepared as we would like.  We know that staying physically and emotionally strong will help the outcome, rather than leaving the detritus, the flood of fear and the end result to consume our lives.


So in stemming the flow of muddy water into my home, I once again felt in control.  I had made this effort, I was rewarded and it was another small step in the rise of self-worth.
Do not let the flood waters of fear ebb into your LIFE.  They are not helpful to you or your CHILDREN, they represent uncertain, fearful change and as such can become, if left for too long, out of control. 

So prepare and gather up your fantastic life tools to keep yourself strong.  Have the CONFIDENCE in your ability, be kind to yourself, respectful and ultimately you begin to commit to daily positive housekeeping of the mind and the energy in your home.
With my love Natasha X


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